Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Ted "Tube" Stevens in the news again

It's old news now but I couldn't let Senator Ted Steven's latest foible go unmentioned. It appears the old oil man's world is naught but a series of tubes, not unlike the oil and gas pipelines in which he would so love to enmesh his home state of Alaska. Here is how the Chairman of the United States Senate Committee on Commerce, Science and Transportation describes the internet:

Ten movies streaming across that, that internet, and what happens to your own personal internet? I just the other day internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday, I got it yesterday. Why? ... They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the Internet. And again, the Internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a big truck.

It's a series of tubes.

And if you don't understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

I can't help but close with some Daily Show send-ups of Stevens and company in the Senate, courtesy of YouTube:

With Senator Byrd
John McCain on Ted Stevens
Jon Stewart explaining Ted Stevens
John Hodgman deciphering Ted Stevens

"If that ... that internet had as many tubes as I have intestine we wouldn't need the truck. WAR, I say!"


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